LESSON 10: GIVE IT TIME
This lesson from grief may actually sound annoying at first. I remember when Goddy died and a senior friend told me I will feel better with time. 😏
In my mind I was like shebi you’re mad? Are you saying I’ll forget my brother after some time? Let my brother just come back, I don’t want any feeling better with time, I want to be better now 😂
But the truth is, I did feel better with time. The people that said time heals all wounds sure knew what they were saying. Personally, I can attest to this statement as a fact.
Since my brother died on 8th June 2011, every other June 8 has always been a bad day for me. Most times, I’ll wake up grouchy without knowing what was making me feel that way. It will be hours later that I may remember that it is the anniversary of my brother’s death.
But for the first time this year, I didn’t wake up grouchy, it was a very normal day for me. It was when I logged into Facebook in the evening that my previous posts about the matter reminded me.
It took me 13 whole years before I had a normal June 8! So if you’ve just recently lost a loved one, give it time.
One of the things I’ve realized that keep people in a space of pain is trying not to forget your dead loved ones or feeling guilty when the pain you feel about their death begins to subside.
Giving it time doesn’t mean that you’ll forget all about them; they will always be a part of your memory one way or another.
Giving it time means that just like me, after some time (be it weeks, months, or even years), you’ll be able to remember your loved one without a flood of tears or that sharp pain in your chest that feels like a truck load of stones were dumped on you.
When that time comes when you do feel better, embrace it and enjoy the new dispensation. You deserve to live a pain free life so do yourself the favour of being and feeling better. 🥂
P.S it’s a wrap guys. Thank you all for following my lessons on grief. I hope they are helpful for all those grieving.
PPBlessing 